Friday, October 10, 2008

McCain Is A Space Alien

ROSWELL – An extremely reliable source has revealed that Republican presidential candidate John McCain, is the child of space aliens.

The sources, who would only give their names as Gordoc and his mate Carotid, have decided to come clean since Mr. McCain has been acting erratically and inciting, lately. They felt they could shed some light on this, by talking to the press.

They traveled here from Tralfamadore two days ago, and have finally recovered from jet lag. They wanted to publicly apologize for McCain’s behavior, stating “We did not bring him up this way. We don’t know what has happened to John. We brought him up to be tolerant of all bipeds.”

They said they would be talking with their son before flying back to Tralfamadore. With a stop in Hawaii, the trip should take about one week.


Mr Koughee said...

I hear ya brother. I have noticed that his arms (tenticles) do not funtion properly in Earth's atmoshpere. Also the large mass on the left side of his face houses his oxygen processing unit. I also believe that his wife Cindy is also an alien. Have you seen that "thing"? Where's Fox Mulder when you need him the most.

Anonymous said...

No slam, but there's unnecessary commas in the middle paragraph.

Also, why would it take a week to get back when it only took two days to get here?

Also, McCain's dad wasn't a native Tralfamadoridite.
He was born on an asteroid known as Tukhus, which was wiped from the universe by the Charminoids.
They were responsible for wiping many planets, but were flushed for good in the Bidet Period.